honest...once.

A new song is up and you can find it here. http://www.myspace.com/melanieannabelle .

Thought i would make that available to anyone that cared to know.

Tonight is such a weird evening. I haven't been able to sleep lately and I feel as if I have tried everything to aid a restful and uninterrupted night. Honestly, my day feels similar to my night. the night creeps in and i'm filled with worry and doubt. I do believe that my biggest enemy is myself. I have been wondering lately about leaving.

Something happened today that basically produced a reaction in me that was less than ideal. It caused me to remember things I'd rather forget and i isolated myself from dear friends in order to deal with it. I hate that I'd rather deal with things apart from others. after doing my best to get completely alone, I always look around and think 'where the hell did everyone go? of course they left, I knew they would.' i hate being alone. big surprise. but if i push them away early on and test their loyalty, i am less disappointed later. it's a great system that i have worked out. not.

thanksgiving is tomorrow. i wish i was with my family. even though they don't celebrate. it sure would be nice to see them. i think i will just pretend the whole day doesn't actually exist. go about my day regularly. maybe.

i wish i could get honest. once.